Without internet access I really could not stay in the house. What would I do all day? Watch day time TV! I don't think so. It would drive me mad. I feel very sad again today after feeling so positive the other day. I guess this is normal. Driving to Mum's on my own just felt so wrong. Why is she not stiing next to me. I want to reach out as I always did when she was sleeping and put my hand on her leg. God I miss you so much Judy! I don't think I can bear it!!!!